Ode to my Father I am staring out the back window looking onto horse pasture when see it. It is a wheelbarrow which well past its prime with flecked remnants of metallic blue paint scattered over rusted metal Derived from old English “bearwe” device used carry load. propped up against paddock just underneath roof overhang that protects it cold november rain. belongs father who has long since passed. miss him. way he would watch me and smile his heartwarming grin accepted completely as if had looked into soul measured was good. A boy loved worthy love someone could ascend greatness given right circumstance. for circumstance now there something keeps drawing wheelbarrow. Is memories sitting in bin on late summer evenings yard garden clutching deep purple pansies tiny fingers clasped green plastic containers? My stop say should we put one here? either approve or shake head left indicate intimated displeasure curls bounced face. He then start running firmly entrenched giggled down inhaling beauty evening viewed through eyes seven year completely. The earthy tones clung hair clothes. His rich singing voice boomed off walls our small country house giving comfort drifted sleep happily cocooned opening notes Sinatra at MSG. heavy work coat floppy white hat protected him rain never seemed notice. omnipresent black jack boots sneak wear around house. They were cloak armor them conquer world. At night read Tom Sawyer together tricked neighborhood kids painting fence free. ancient China means more weight individual manage their own. help distribute load weight. think about lot these days. shutting surgical career because lost dexterity caused by premature death brain cells referred Parkinson's disease. Weight an expression gravity. Gravity heavy. As you have grave prognosis son. Fuck can't be Nope isn't. But this properly maybe will survive. envision neurologist cross legged wheel hospital stopping briefly disperse thunderclaps devastating neurological diagnoses unsuspecting patients. run fast can slick marble floor laughs unrestrained all wanted some but continues laughing tosses crushing diseases patient rooms like Oprah gave away cars. You get ALS you tumor. When end hallway open emergency door pitch stairs. Without gravity no We need both. Like Milan Kundera so eloquently brilliant novel without lightness unbearable.